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Posted: 03 Apr 2013 05:13 AM PDT

Helping children overcome shyness is best done during their formative years.

SHYNESS is a feeling of awkwardness, worry, or tension during social encounters, especially with unfamiliar people. Severely shy people may exhibit physical symptoms like blushing, sweating, a pounding heart or upset stomach.

They could also be filled with negative feelings about themselves and worry how others see them.

Feeling shy on occasion is perfectly normal. However, some people face intense feelings of shyness that may prevent them from interacting with others. This usually leads to problems in school, at work, and in relationships.

If this leads to significant impairment in social activities or relationships, then it is no longer shyness but a psychological problem called social phobia (fear of humiliation or possible scrutiny by others), and this requires professional help.

A person who is suffering from social phobia usually will find it easy to interact with his family or close friends. But, he will be under great pressure if he has to meet new faces, and he will tend to avoid such situations.

Identifying shyness

In children, the most common observable symptom of shyness is "avoidance behaviour", where the child tries to avoid all situations where he or she has to meet other people.

The child may exhibit anger, resort to crying, or keep silent (elective mutism) if he or she is forced into such a situation. If you have a child who struggles with shyness, it is advisable that you address and improve the issue while the child is still in his formative years.

Addressing the situation at an early stage ensures the child can enjoy a better and healthier school experience – which gradually leads to more confidence in later life.

Be observant of your child's mannerisms and reactions in order to find out whether your child is shy. How you can help?

·Do not ridicule or make fun of your child in public

Shy children are afraid of peer rejection and worry whatever they say or do may be perceived as incompetent. Therefore, negative comments or labels are dangerous, as they will cause emotional distress to your child.

This may make him become even more withdrawn or reserved.

·Do not label your child as "shy"

Accepting your child for who he is is very important; labelling him as "a shy child" will make him more likely to be shy. Therefore, it is important to accept the child as he is – this can make him feel more confident and less inhibited.

·Build up your child's self-esteem and confidence

Shy children tend to have doubts about their capabilities. They also have negative self-image and constantly think that they will not be accepted.

Nurture your child's sense of self-esteem and confidence by allowing him to make decisions and take responsibility for them. Praise and acknowledge him when appropriate. This can help him feel good about himself.

·Be a role model for confident social behaviour

Children usually learn by imitating the people around them, so be sure to exhibit the characteristics that you want them to have. For instance, should you observe that your child is struggling in certain areas, like greeting people, make a point to model those behaviours in front of him.

·Teach your child social skills early

Good social skills need to be developed; some children may have greater aptitude for it than others, but practice makes perfect. The earlier you begin teaching your child, the better it is for him.

Allow your child to pick up social skills by letting him "practise" with people as much as possible. You could also encourage your shy child to speak up when you are with them. Utilise every opportunity you have – for instance, if the child wants to buy something, get him to take the money to the cashier at the counter.

·Teach tolerance and respect for others

Shy children are particularly judgemental of themselves and others, thus you will need to teach him or her to be tolerant and respectful of others.

If you are overly critical as a parent, your child will tend to follow and pick up a similar attitude. In the long run, he will believe that others are judging him. Be a good role model – tell him that no one is perfect, but they should be accepted in spite of their imperfections.

·Learning from experience

Help your children learn by making positive comments about how you felt as you accomplished certain tasks or things. Let them know it is all right to "explore" and try taking risks; though we may make mistakes at times and fail.

If you've tried all the tips listed and your child is still not showing any positive progress, be patient and give him or her some time. However, you must be alert to your child's moods and behaviours.

If he or she shows signs of anxiety that is becoming very severe, or shows complex symptoms or suicidal thoughts or intentions, it is very important that you contact a mental health professional or a child psychologist for professional help. References:

1. http://www.une.edu.au/bcss/psychology/john-malouff/shyness.php

2. Zimbardo PG and Radl S. The shy child: A parent's guide to parenting and overcoming shyness from infancy to adulthood. ISHK: 1999.

3. http://www.shakeyourshyness.com/parentingshychildren.htm

4. http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/shyness.aspx#

5. http://www.healthguidance.org/entry/15846/1/Shyness-in-Children.html

■ Associate Professor Dr M Swamenathan is a consultant psychiatrist. This article is courtesy of Positive Parenting Programme by the Malaysian Paediatric Association. For further information, please visit www.mypositiveparenting.org. The information provided is for educational and communication purposes only and it should not be construed as personal medical advice. Information published in this article is not intended to replace, supplant or augment a consultation with a health professional regarding the reader's own medical care. The Star does not give any warranty on accuracy, completeness, functionality, usefulness or other assurances as to the content appearing in this column. The Star disclaims all responsibility for any losses, damage to property or personal injury suffered directly or indirectly from reliance on such information.

Healing with heat

Posted: 03 Apr 2013 05:11 AM PDT

What is Mitsui Onnetsu therapy? You can learn more about this heat therapy at The Star Health Fair 2013.

HEAT is a natural healer. When our body comes under viral attack, it develops fever in an attempt to fend off the attacks. Fever improves the body's defence system and thus increases the capability of the body to combat the "intruders".

In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), moxibustion (a form of thermal therapy using moxa) has been used to treat chronic illnesses and to improve health for thousands of years. Together with acupuncture and herbal medicine, they form the three pillars of TCM.

In modern oncology studies, doctors from many parts of the world (e.g. Germany, Japan, the United States) are using hyperthermia (a treatment method for cancer and other difficult illnesses using high temperature) to augment traditional cancer treatments such as chemotherapy and radiotherapy, and to raise the immunity of cancer patients.

Research studies in the last 10 years show positive outcomes, although much is yet to be understood. Thousands of studies are currently underway, and many oncologists consider hyperthermia as an important element in cancer treatment.

Technology has contributed much to the advances of modern medical science. Onnetsu therapy, a Japanese thermotherapy modality invented by Dr Tomeko Mitsui, has gained popularity in recent years.

Centres offering this therapy modality has been set up in many parts of Japan. Mitsui Onnetsuki, the device used to deliver this therapy, has been approved as a home medical device by Japan's health ministry.

Apart from alleviating pains and aches, this device is capable of providing heat in the form of far infrared rays deep into the core of the body, promoting blood circulation in the deep organ tissues. It can even be a home hyperthermia device if use appropriately.

Tan Meng Kwang will be at The Star Health Fair 2013 to explain and demonstrate how this technological innovation of thermal medicine from Japan is capable of helping patients with chronic illnesses to alleviate their symptoms. This device can also help those who are conscious of their own health to maintain and prolong good health.

Tan is a highly respected educator and practitioner in the arena of holistic wellness. He received his Bachelor of Science (Hons) degree in Chemistry from the National University of Singapore. In between working stints, he went on to pursue and achieve three Masters degrees in Science, Education and Business Administration in Britain, Australia and Singapore, respectively.

To date, he has trained many physiotherapists, nurses and even doctors on these therapies. He is also the author of several books on various wellness topics.

In addition, at the health fair, you can learn more about Great Eastern Life's 21 Days Mobile App, which can help you kick your bad habits by setting up reminders to motivate you to keep track of your intentions to live healthily. Learn more about it at Great Eastern Life's Live Great Portal on livegreat.greateasternlife.com.

You can also look forward to the Live Great Challenge at the health fair – a contest to test one's physical and mental fitness, financial fitness, nutrition knowledge, and to advocate healthy eating. Attractive cash prizes await you!

Great Eastern Life's Live Great Programme is a holistic health and wellness approach which aims to help Malaysians live healthier, better and longer lives. The programme comprises expert advice, simple health tips, support, articles, apps, rewards, workshops and events, and more.

■ This year's theme 'Let's Live Great!' is to inspire Malaysians to lead a healthy lifestyle by being physically and mentally fit. The Star Health Fair 2013 is organised by The Star with Great Eastern Life as the event partner. It will be held in Halls 1 to 3 of the Mid Valley Exhibition Centre from April 12 to 14. It is open from 10am to 7pm and admission is free. For enquiries or to participate, call 03-79671388 (ext 1243/1529) or visit www.face book.com/thestarhealthfair.

Towards health and wellness

Posted: 03 Apr 2013 05:10 AM PDT

Live great moments with Great Eastern Life.

WHAT does health and wellness mean to each of us? The word "health" itself has a wide definition, with the most well recognised being that created by the World Health Organisation in 1948, stating: "Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity."

However you interpret the word "health", leading a healthy lifestyle is about making choices, healthy choices that have a direct impact on our loved ones.

After all, the most precious thing you can give your loved ones is for you to be there at all times. Yet, health is something we constantly take for granted, and most of us, at one time or another, have been guilty of neglecting our health, often choosing to turn a blind eye to unhealthy habits that can be disastrous to health.

For Lim Keng Hoe, a director of a shipping company based in Singapore, his vice was smoking. "Initially, it was just social smoking, but then it started to turn into an unhealthy fixation, especially when work stress got too much for me to handle. My addiction got the better of me and I ended up smoking several packs a day. I knew that it was affecting my health and I wanted to quit, but I just could not find the will to carry out my intention."

Lim's life took a full turn when he discovered that his wife was pregnant with their first child. "I decided my lifestyle choices had to change as I did not want my smoking habit to affect those I love. More importantly, I wanted to make sure that I would always be there for my family and keeping healthy will definitely help me do just that."

Lim's wife then introduced him to the Great Eastern Life Live Great Programme's 21 Days App, which is based on the theory that it takes 21 days to truly change your behaviour, and he decided to give it a go to help him kick his bad habit.

"The App allowed me to share my goal to quit smoking with my friends on Facebook and Twitter, and they have been very supportive. I've stopped smoking for more than 10 months now. I owe it to the 21 Days App as it was the one which spurred me to quit smoking," he observed.

The 21 Days App is part of Great Eastern Life's Live Great Programme that aims to enable people to achieve holistic wellness and health by providing expert advice, simple health tips, workshops and events, exclusive privileges, wellness tools and rewards with the aim to achieve holistic health and wellness.

This is all to help you realise your intentions to live healthier, better and longer for the ones who matter most.

Choosing to live healthily for the ones you love can indeed be a strong motivational drive for any person. Tan Lay Seong, a Great Eastern Life Group Sales Manager, agrees.

"Although I own a life insurance plan, that doesn't stop me from taking care of my health. My wife and two children are very important to me and I do not want them to worry about me in the event I fall sick. In any case, I try to follow a healthy diet and foster a healthy relationship with my family by having lots of meaningful conversations," he shares.

Great Eastern Life, in living up to its brand position as a life company, believes that cultivating meaningful relationships with your loved ones is a vital ingredient in the recipe for holistic well-being.

Research over the past few decades has shown that social support essentially predicts the outcome of physical and mental health for everyone.

Aware of how important and unique family members are to each other, Great Eastern Life has organised talks focusing on family relationships.

For example, no expense was spared for the "Smart for Life Tea Talk" which saw Great Eastern Life flying in Dick Cheng, a professional therapist with more than 20 years of experience in Hong Kong, to speak to a crowd of more than 1,000 people on family ties.

During the Tea Talk organised as part of the Live Great Programme, the audience were enthralled as they listened to helpful and relevant tips on rekindling special feelings and open communication.

"My children are beginning to develop their own opinions and they are different from how we were in the past. The talk helped me have a better understanding of how to better communicate with them and improve family ties," says Tan, who is a proud father of two children aged six and nine years.

"Trust and commitment is vital in your relationship with your partner, and it is one of the many things which I was reminded of during the talk," he adds.

Great Eastern Life is the event partner for the Star Health Fair 2013. This year's theme "Let's Live Great!" is to inspire Malaysians to lead a healthy lifestyle by being physically and mentally fit. n Join in the journey to health and wellness with your loved ones by visiting Great Eastern Life's booth and take part in the "Live Great Day Experience" and "Live Great Challenge". The Star Health Fair will be held in Halls 1 to 3 of the Mid Valley Exhibition Centre from April 12 to 14. It is open from 10am to 7pm and admission is free. For enquiries or to participate, call 03-79671388 (ext 1243/1529) or visit www.facebook.com/thestarhealth fair.

Kredit: www.thestar.com.my

Rabu, 3 April 2013

The Star Online: Lifestyle: Health

The Star Online: Lifestyle: Health

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